Hard decision

Two days ago I posted about whether renewing my RWA membership or not, openly expressing some of my fears and concerns. Thanks to all the people who read the post and commented on it. Although I couldn't answer each one of your comments (something that I apologize for), I did read them. Some of you told me to follow my heart. Well, my heart wanted to renew it for one more year. My mind agreed up to a point because it was thinking about the RWR magazine and its wonderful articles. However, after spending long hours with my saving account and bills before me, throwing numbers and seeing where it'd get me, my financial state showed that spending money on the membership renewal would set me back, and I'd not be able to catch up for several months. And with the upcoming increase in the water bill, plus the new sales tax law (something we had never paid before), it's possible that might create a hole in my pocket would be bigger. The way things are going, I don't even know if I'll have a job several months from now. Remember what my horoscope said for this month? "Soon Mars will move from your House of Your Crazy Self to your House of Spending Too Much." I think Mars managed to stay in both houses at the same time, because it's been crazy, and I've been spending a lot. "When the big bonus check shows up, don't blow it on a new computer as your old one is really fine." I'm still waiting for that one though and today is the last day. *sighs* So, today is the last day for me to renew my RWA membership. Sadly, I won't since it has become a luxury I can no longer afford. Maybe in a few years from now...