LA Banks's workshop: Day 3 (Update)

I just came from reading Leslie's comments on my dialogue between Andras and Jenny. This is what she said about it: Silma, this story is really cute and has VAST potential… but show me this Muse, he’s a Greek God, right??? Gurl, c’mon, now (smile!) He shows up, I take it she hasn’t had a man in a while… he’s sexy, sensual, hedonistic, etc., and in her face… then he’s kissed her, and has mystical stuff with him… sooooo besides a moan, what does the kiss feel like, what does this huge Titan feel like, his skin, body hard body…? All of that stuff is right there if you take the gloves off. Great story concept, too, by the way… so “work” it What can I say? Just like my heroine, I write love scenes that are as lively as two dead fish mating. (Translation: I suck at writing romance.) At least I made Leslie almost pee in her panties with the exchange between Andras and Jenny. *lol* Hmm... And here I thought I could turn this story into an erotic romance. It seems like it's turning more and more into a romantic comedy. Anyway, Leslie gave me some excellent feedback on that scene (which is the ending of chapter 3 and the hook for chapter 4). *grins* Now I have to sit and absorb all these ideas calmly. One thing I know for sure. I'm going to have to move around a lot of the stuff I wrote in that chapter in order to readjust the POV's and add all these ideas Leslie has planted in my brain (which is a dangerous thing to do).