Do I look like I live in Fantasy Island?

Just recently Briana suggested me to write a story set in Puerto Rico, and since there aren't many romance novels set where I live, I thought it was a great idea. I mean, who better to write a novel set here than me, a native from the island, born and raised here? After all, I could create a more realistic setting, right? So I said to myself, "Bueno Silma, manos a la obra. Let's get buzy!" So for the past two weeks I've agonized over the story. Okay, I don't have a title for it. No problem. I could work something out once it's written. Next. I've got the setting: Puerto Rico. Now, where in Borinquen? Small town or San Juan? That could have an impact in the story. Hmm... At the beach or the country? Oookay... Maybe I could get back to this later. So I moved on to the real good stuff: characters, conflict, and plot. Yes, I've got my hero and heroine in Puerto Rico. Now, who's my hero and heroine? Is one local and the other isn't? Perhaps one is a tourist? If she is the local one, she must have big butts, big hips. Totally curvy. Hmm... No good. In a market target for American women, I don't think they can identify with busty and curvy heroines. How about if he is a local? He'd have to be small, around 5'6" to 5'8", with a lean body, like a surfer. Hmm... Nope, no good. Okay, forget characters. I could work on the characters later. How about conflict? Well, they could...uh... hmm... My mind remained blissfully blank. Then I tried a series of mix-and-match ideas for my characters, but they all fell into the "summer love" category. You know, meet during summer, have great sex, and at the end they say good-bye. Good for smut, but not romantic. Finally, hoping to jumpstart my writing muse, Briana asked me, "What can happen only in Puerto Rico because of the heat?" And I went, "Uh?" Let's face it, I couldn't think of anything, but I already told you about that part of my writing hell, right? Anyway, it was obvious that I needed help, so I decided to ask around the following question: When you think of Puerto Rico, what comes to your mind? Them: "Chupacabras!" Me: *growls* "Let's not go there, sistah." It's a sad, dark day for my beloved island when the only thing people can remember it for is the chupacabras. We're ashamed of it. Let us be! NEXT! Them: "I think of exotic fruits like mangoes." Me: "What's so exotic about mangoes? We've got a tree in the backyard. Do you know how much mangoes stink when they fall on the ground and you don't throw them far away soon?" Them: "Beautiful exotic tall palm trees." Me: "You've got to be kidding! They grow everywhere like weed. Don't let a coconut too close to the ground, or a palm tree will quickly sprout. (Oops! Did I just rhymed? I must be sicker than I thought.) Mom has two on big pots decorating the front porch. And they're very dangerous 'cause they attract lightning like you won't believe it." Them: "Lots of heat and beaches!" Me: "Er... I don't feel like writing an Annette-and-Frankie, beach romance novel. Makes me wanna puke." Them: "Skimpy bikinis. Maybe no tops!" Me: "Uh, you don't wanna do that here unless you want to be arrested for indecent exposure." Them: "A fun place to live." Me: "You've got us confused with Disney or Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch." Them: "Oh, the place sounds like it's jumping with action and adventure." Me: "Not even Agent 007 could get any action here. Unless he paid for it." Them: "Gosh, you're so lucky to live there. It sounds like such an idyllic place to live." Me: "Where do they think I live? Fantasy Island?" I can see Tattoo in my mind announcing the incoming planes at the Luis Muñoz Marin International Airport. ("Boss! The plane! The plane!"). Puerto Rico isn't la isla del encanto, people.